[this could be] :: ANYWHERE :: [in the world]

Its early morning when all the crises subside and the world sleeps, and it feels like I'm in the in between for now. No one needs me right now, as I steal upstairs, avoiding creaks in the stairs as thought I've been at this for years. The door to my room gives way under my hand, and I pause in the doorway to my room.

For one instant, I see it how it was, and then I see it how it is. Empty and blue, a mattress that used to hold two, memories upon memories. Two windows, one facing east, one fasting west. The east window is brightening, and the west window, at the head of the bed, is privy to the most stunning colour of pale blue. I sit on my bed, hands pressed against the window, eyes close, exhale, hear my heartbeat in my ears, feel it in my fingers, inhale.

Time stops.

I look over my shoulder, out the east window. Sleep wont find me now. I leave the bed, cross the room. Strength and silence I didn't know I have opens the window and years of habit help me out. I slip on the mild slope, condensation underfoot, and I pause, arm braced on the sill. Think, breathe. I must look like a thief stealing away. Or maybe just a girl. A cold hush permeates the world for an instant as I regain my balance, straighten out and sit.

Music is in my ears and I take in the world. Birds are beginning to emerge, small and whip-like, and I want to know why I cant ever remember them being there before. Facing east, I cant see the orb that is the sun yet. Just her effects as my fragile world tilts toward her, a moth to a flame. The sky is streaked like a curtain, with a confused mix of the most spectacular pink with severe lines and custard yellow chasing away the blue, simply to beget more blue. Even the sky doesn't know what she wants to be, and oh, I feel her on that one. Its getting warmer, as the sky chases itself.

Its like the sun is the leading lady to a great performance, and the show that is on tonight is Life, and as she enters the stage, the curtains sweep away, because why should the darkness obscure such beauty? She'll shine on all of us, and we'll act for her, because its all we know how to do.

I can see the edge of the brightness, hidden by houses that I haven't seen in so long, I forgot they were there. For a moment, I look around, and I remember that I've seen this all before. A million times. And yet, it wasn't me seeing it, and it is strange and beautiful to me now, like this. I turn back, afraid to miss a moment of the curtain's draw.

And there she is. How long have I been here? I don't know. Forever. I could have been here forever, just a statue or a ghost, a faint apparition, just forever on this roof, in this moment, disappearing between the lines into the space unimagined. The sky pales beside the intensity of the sun, and I missed her, now that I think about it. I took her for granted in the biggest way, and maybe there is time to fix that.

I may be a bit late to the show, but I still made it.

My body protests as I find my footing, and climb back inside, the room infinitely lighter than before. I crawl into my nest of covers, facing west, and close my eyes. I don't even have to meditate to go to sleep.